I want to say that it's completely fine.

While I'm trepidatious to say that I feel better,

I sort of feel better. 

I can't say that it's that one feeling of

when you go to a furniture store and you find the perfect pillow. 

No hug can truly match the relief of that one. 

I know that yours now, never will give me the comfort that I need.

Don't get me wrong,

I'm not strong enough to simply live on without them entirely,

but I just don't think that you fit the mold anymore.

I'd like to believe that I've finally convinced myself that

you are not integral to my livelihood anymore.

I have no beef with admitting that you once were, 

and I basked in the sun of a day with simple greeting of yours,

and died on the rest. 

Deep in the depths of my mind,

there is still a bit of me that does and always will care.

I need to know that and repeat it to myself so that I can finally stop attacking it.

Getting rid of the horror in me will not make me any less scary.

Because in all truth,

any human contains the self-destruct button that is the ability to be feared.

Hurting others has become so easy for the offenders

that there stops being a point in the defenders.

There is no purpose in going the right way when all others are in the wrong,

at least publicly. 

I also like to think that I try to go in the right direction,

that I'm not too far gone in what appears to be a newer, freakish version of human nature. 

It will absolutely consume us all,

because too many people have given up what they believe they were made for.

Then they realize that they were made for nothing

but the grand design of lifeforms in the universe. 

This is too much for those that dare investigate that part of their minds.

The pain of having no importance weighs heavier than that of an anvil.

I miss you a bit,

but I know that you were the anvil of which I had no importance,

I hope that she is the feather that will make you feel the opposite.

For your sake,

I truly hope that she is,

because I don't know how much pressure one could place on 

a heart too weak to beat for another one that bleeds. 

Human Dignity + Compassion = Peace.